Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Review: X-Men Origins: Wolverine (yes, SPOILERS)


A near dvd quality version of X-Men Origins: Wolverine leaked today and it was no April's Fools Joke. I wish it was but it isn't. Some fx shots were unfinished but it was the entire film. I had eagerly anticipated this film and what follows below is my brief fanboy review/critique of the film. It isn't a detailing of the film and all the spoilers but IT WILL CONTAIN PLENTY OF SPOILERS...



Like I said, I was excited to see this film. Usually I am a stickler for adherence to the source material in regards to comic book movies. However, I was willing to let some shit slide with Wolverine so long as it told a good story and remained true to the essence of Wolverine's origin and his character. This film did neither and was utter garbage.

It took us on a pretty quick ride up to the point where Hugh Jackman could play the character. I was ok with Victor Creed aka Sabertooth being James/Logan/Wolverine's brother even though (at this point) he is not in the books. I was ok with the introduction of the proto-Weapon X program mutant special forces.
Weapon Zero (aka Maverick): If his power is silly, blame the 90's. It was nice to see an Asian man play this role.
Fred Dukes (aka The Blob): Ridiculous! Pointless! I don't get it.
Wade (aka Deadpool): HIGHLIGHT OF THE FILM! Ryan Reynolds played Deadpool dead on. This character's non-stop smart-ass remarks were true to the comic.

The film seemed to quickly become Wolverine in The Wizard Of Oz. He runs into way too many mutants on his "journey." It was bullshit pandering to fanboys but also betraying any integrity to those very characters (just like X-Men 3). Cyclops? Emma Frost? Banshee? Did I see Quicksilver?! Give me a fuckin break!

My biggest beef with the whole film is that although it takes elements of Barry Windsor-Smith's Weapon X storyline, Wolverine retains his memory and does not go 'berserker' upon the adamantium bonding. In fact, he retains some sugary sweet good guy persona throughout the film. ( I will spare you the illogical manner in which he finally does lose his memory.) Perhaps this is a good time to note that I was extremely against Marvel revealing Wolverine's origins any further than Barry Windsor-Smith's story. I was afraid that the very troubled/confused/angry mystique of Wolverine would be lost. This film ignored all of that. Hugh Jackman's Wolverine was less an embodiment of the character in this film than in the original X-Men film!

My next biggest beef is the finale. One of the biggest highlights of the film, as I previously mentioned, is Ryan Reynolds' Deadpool. I had hoped to see a post-disfigurement Deadpool... Well, I kinda did. The big baddie at the end, Mr. Weapon XI turns out to be Deadpool but he has swords that extend out of his wrists, Cyclop-like optic blasts!, and no fuckin mouth! How are you gonna take away Deadpool's mouth?!?!
Victor Creed is also hellbent on killing Wolverine most of the film... up until the end for some apparent reason when they decide to join forces.

By the way, did you know that Wolverine can do ANYTHING with his adamantium claws? Yep. Like brake a motorcycle, swordfight, and deflect optic blasts.

This movie pissed my fanboy side off enough to give you one more big spoiler:
Professor X played by Patrick Stewart turns up at the end to rescue young mutants and I assume start The X-Men thanks to Wolverine and Gambit (who, by the way is played by a moron and only keeps a Cajun accent for his first 2 lines.)


I think this film took a decent-to-very good comic book story and made it fit a trite Hollywood formula. That doesn't suit the fanboy in me but it will probably suit the box office (better than Watchmen).


Blogger frank as fuck said...

Hey dude, I don't know if you're aware or not, because I haven't read this whole post. Haven't decided if I want to read the spoilers or what not yet, but:

This isn't a final release. It's a workprint. ( There's supposedly 15 or so minutes missing, a bunch effects left out, and possibly even a different plot. Just something to think about in case you consider seeing it in a theater.

9:57 AM  
Blogger jduke said...

I just finished watching this movie a few minutes ago and I must say this a shitty movie. Every point the reviewer here is absolotuly correct.

I put this movie in the same crap category as X-Men 3 and Spiderman 3.

2:42 PM  
Anonymous straightupridah said...

Yup, I watched it as well. This movie was absolute horseshit. Maybe even worse than Daredevil was. That's bad. Jduke, u hit the nail right on the head.

12:27 AM  
Anonymous Jitters said...

Hugh (Huge) Jackman must have worked out for years prior to filming this

1:46 PM  

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