Assistant To The CEO. Part 1
I hate my job. What else is new?
What follows is a rant; pure and simple.
Any Personal or Executive Assistant probably has similar stories. After all, what is such an Assistant but someone a wealthier person pays to be responsible for them.
My day at work as Assistant to the CEO:
CEO is driving me nuts...
He walks in at 9ish and tells me to get a certain obscure office supply. He says "go pick them up... at Office Max or something"...as if I have time to go around to places
Then just now, he walks by my desk and says HE is going to get them then, ONCE AGAIN, starts in on decorating the conference rooms telling me that I am taking too long.
So I tell him- "I am certainly not trying to be slow. I just need to get certain supplies..."
and he tells me (talking over me) "I get things done. I make sure things move fast!"
I tell him that I was just ordering the supplies and he says he will pick em up then starts in an another million other bullshit projects- insisting that there are easy to find and cheap sites that frame online and that I can't find them "have you search picture framing onine?!.. Google 'picture framing online'!"
My new philosophy is to be rude and forceful right back at him and just not care about the speed of shit.
He is so unrealistic!
CEO comes in and I ask to meet with him re; a bunch of scheduling I have been trying to get him to go over ... he says no and insists I must first apply stickers to a poster and then can talk to him. So I do so and walk back to his office and he is unavailable.
Typical.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS! CEO acts like a retarded asshole! It blows my mind sometimes.
If I am expected to do my job- he should be expected to do his!
ok- so I FINALLY catch him and ask if he has a sec. He says yes...
I start going into my stuff and he is ignoring me totally
-For instance: I say "your flight arrives at 11. You have a lunch scheduled at noon. Can you make it?" After ignoring me, he starts asking unclear questions and as I try to answer, he just talks over me... and then asking/demanding to know when his flight arrives.
At one point, I start discussing June 11th and he interrupts and starts going off about an appointment I need to put on the date... but then says the appointment is for June 18th!
I said- "ok but I am talkin about June 11th" He ignores me.
The only time he stopped what he was doing to really give his attention to me was when I said BigWig#1 was unavailable for a planned dinner. He wasked if the other bigwigs were available. I said I had not confirmed with them becuz I was waiting on a time and location. He stopped, looked at me, and flipped out about how we need that asap! Everytime I confirmed and agreed, he would start the lecturing over and over - not listening to me agreeing.
Keep in mind that last week I tried to schedule all this and he stopped me and told me we could just do it this week (he still has not given me the needed info)!
I just stopped talking. Glared him in the eyes and waited for him to shut up. Then I said "I got it" and moved on
I was close to telling him he was too high maintenance and walkin out!
oh! one more thing... I gave him his expense report to review/sign. 1-2 days later, it is sitting on my desk with some receipts and it was unsigned... so, I checked and some of the receipts were old and had already been paid. The new ones I added. This morning he asked me about the (old) receipts. I told him he was already paid...
I added the new reciepts and gave him his expense report back to sign. He then condescendingly told me I shouldn't have added those receipts to his expense!!!!!
I told him I would bring in the "correct" report for him to sign RIGHT THEN... as I approached his office, he left!
I am so frustrated I can barely focus.
I forget to mention- I informed CEO that if he wants this certain shit moved, taking the velcro off the wall will remove the paint. His response was that it was no big deal becuz I could just get some paint and touch up the wall!!!
Has he no concept of reality?!
What follows is a rant; pure and simple.
Any Personal or Executive Assistant probably has similar stories. After all, what is such an Assistant but someone a wealthier person pays to be responsible for them.
My day at work as Assistant to the CEO:
CEO is driving me nuts...
He walks in at 9ish and tells me to get a certain obscure office supply. He says "go pick them up... at Office Max or something"...as if I have time to go around to places
Then just now, he walks by my desk and says HE is going to get them then, ONCE AGAIN, starts in on decorating the conference rooms telling me that I am taking too long.
So I tell him- "I am certainly not trying to be slow. I just need to get certain supplies..."
and he tells me (talking over me) "I get things done. I make sure things move fast!"
I tell him that I was just ordering the supplies and he says he will pick em up then starts in an another million other bullshit projects- insisting that there are easy to find and cheap sites that frame online and that I can't find them "have you search picture framing onine?!.. Google 'picture framing online'!"
My new philosophy is to be rude and forceful right back at him and just not care about the speed of shit.
He is so unrealistic!
CEO comes in and I ask to meet with him re; a bunch of scheduling I have been trying to get him to go over ... he says no and insists I must first apply stickers to a poster and then can talk to him. So I do so and walk back to his office and he is unavailable.
Typical.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS! CEO acts like a retarded asshole! It blows my mind sometimes.
If I am expected to do my job- he should be expected to do his!
ok- so I FINALLY catch him and ask if he has a sec. He says yes...
I start going into my stuff and he is ignoring me totally
-For instance: I say "your flight arrives at 11. You have a lunch scheduled at noon. Can you make it?" After ignoring me, he starts asking unclear questions and as I try to answer, he just talks over me... and then asking/demanding to know when his flight arrives.
At one point, I start discussing June 11th and he interrupts and starts going off about an appointment I need to put on the date... but then says the appointment is for June 18th!
I said- "ok but I am talkin about June 11th" He ignores me.
The only time he stopped what he was doing to really give his attention to me was when I said BigWig#1 was unavailable for a planned dinner. He wasked if the other bigwigs were available. I said I had not confirmed with them becuz I was waiting on a time and location. He stopped, looked at me, and flipped out about how we need that asap! Everytime I confirmed and agreed, he would start the lecturing over and over - not listening to me agreeing.
Keep in mind that last week I tried to schedule all this and he stopped me and told me we could just do it this week (he still has not given me the needed info)!
I just stopped talking. Glared him in the eyes and waited for him to shut up. Then I said "I got it" and moved on
I was close to telling him he was too high maintenance and walkin out!
oh! one more thing... I gave him his expense report to review/sign. 1-2 days later, it is sitting on my desk with some receipts and it was unsigned... so, I checked and some of the receipts were old and had already been paid. The new ones I added. This morning he asked me about the (old) receipts. I told him he was already paid...
I added the new reciepts and gave him his expense report back to sign. He then condescendingly told me I shouldn't have added those receipts to his expense!!!!!
I told him I would bring in the "correct" report for him to sign RIGHT THEN... as I approached his office, he left!
I am so frustrated I can barely focus.
I forget to mention- I informed CEO that if he wants this certain shit moved, taking the velcro off the wall will remove the paint. His response was that it was no big deal becuz I could just get some paint and touch up the wall!!!
Has he no concept of reality?!
posted by shane at 8:23 PM
3 Comments:
dude, this makes me so tense. I feel like it's the same everywhere. it makes you wonder how these people, who can barely wipe their own asses, have become bosses. we have the same thing going on at my office. seriously, nothing would ever get done if it weren't for the shit-wipers at the bottom of the pole. a common thing is for the boss to come out, declare something a priority, walk away without discussion, a few days later come out and declare something else a priority (usually something he failed to plan for), a few days later declare something else a priority, and soon you have like five things going on that are all priorities because the dumbasses at the top failed to have any vision. and then they get mad because nothing's getting done, when the whole time, it was their fault for not recognizing (i.e. not managing, as their title suggests). our boss has this special little thing he does where he walks out, stops at your desk, declares something and starts walking away, yelling at you over his shoulder. since this new guy's been in charge, we've had 5 or 6 executive assistants in two years. too bad my skill set is to wipe shit off someone's ass.
In solidarity with a shit-wipers,
Lucas
I am lucky because the people in the office I am currently in are really competent (but it is my last day...).I empathize with the struggle of my comrades who deal with this bullshit all day at work. My last job I remember people always asking me random ass questions out of nowhere, and thinking 'dont you have a pocket pc thing that you claim is yor planner? then why isnt this shit on that?"
All I can think of is the ridiculousness of this person as a humyn being. He sounds like a caricature, and a fucking goof either way.
towards a less shitty future,
harjit
Lucas,
Oh, how I could go on and on...
Two things:
-"not managing, as their title suggests"
It is such an illustration of our society at large. You are so correct: These fuckers do not manage as much as they are managed.
-"too bad my skill set is to wipe shit off someone's ass"
It really is discouraging as I search for a better job and primarily see listings for positions to just wipe someone else's ass.
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